I’m not even talking about drugs I’m really only talking about weed. That’s all I’ve ever done. But it changes you and that’s what I’m going to talk about I suppose.

Why Do I Even Smoke at All if it’s so Bad and Addicting

So I have a story but I have to start a while ago. For the longest time I had the same friends and we would do the same things all the time but I loved them and I loved what we did. We would pretty much just play Xbox together but we’ve been doing it for damn near a decade. And then I started making some new friends that were a grade above me. We would go to Bdubs almost every week and just hangout. And they were a lot different than my other friends and really similar too, but I enjoyed hanging out with them; it was like a change of pace for the first time in my life. And so I kind of stopped hanging out with my first friends and that’s my fault, but… they smoked weed a lot. And I didn’t really. I did every now and then but I was really careful about it and I didn’t like the smell, and there was no way I was going to smoke and drive. So after my older friends graduated, I started hanging out with my first friends, and I also started smoking a lot more. They did it, and I guess I just hated being such an outsider from them… I don’t really know. But I got my own weed pen. And I was extremely careful with it. I would keep it hidden in my closet behind my Diary of a Wimpy Kid books, and I would only hit it late at night when my parents were sleeping, and rarely on school nights. But as time goes on, and you start hitting it a little more, you become complacent. I HATE COMPLACENCY IT IS THE WORST THING TO BE!!! I started breaking the laws I set for myself. I lost my discipline. I would hit it before tennis practice, before working the concession stand… Too much. More than I needed to. But I enjoyed it. “Why not get high real quick?” Then I started hitting it too much. I developed a cough that would hit me almost every day in first period. I woke up and I felt like shit. And I would tell myself, “Alright, no pen today because my tummy hurts,” well… I mean…. that obviously did not work.

Being Addicted to the Cart is Not Ideal

The thing with the cart is that when you first get it, it’s the best it’ll ever be. The more you do it the worse it gets, but the more you do it, the more you want it. It’s a really fucked up scenario to be honest. It tricks you. No wonder they call it the Devil’s Lettuce. But over the summer before college, I didn’t have one. I refused to buy one because they’re so terrible… but my mother had one. Now my mother is not a cart fein; she is in fact, a super lightweight. And me, being evil, would steal it at night. And I would hit and then go put it back. And previously I knew I had a problem with addiction but I really knew it, when one day the cart wasn’t there. And it was all I wanted like what the freak Mom. Anywho, so I realized I needed to quit. Then I got to school and immediately bought a cart. I would hit it before my 9AM and it would wear off by the time I got to class. And then my cart store got raided. To be honest, I’d probably still be doing it if Slackers never closed. So, shoutout the police for making Slackers close.

New, Less Evil Beginnings

So the cart store closed, and I hated it anyways, so I decided I was going to start smoking real weed by myself at school. I found a plug, and bought a pipe and I would smoke weed too often. Every day for like a month straight. And it made me lazy and antisocial. I would eat in my room, or eat outside with my headphones on… I always had my headphones on. It just wasn’t great. Smoking by myself all the time for why?? My excuse was that I wanted to get better at smoking weed, because really I had no idea what I was doing, and I really did want the experience. So I came home for Thanksgiving break, and I was smoking every day. Then, my uprise came. All the time I was smoking in my bathroom was because I didn’t have a roommate, but after break, I did. Where was I going to smoke? So I started smoking in my car, and I would get so stressed out being in my car, like I was definitely going to get caught. Then Christmas break came, and I got another cart which caused me to stop smoking weed so much; I mean I can hit the cart in my bed, I can’t smoke a blunt in my bed. Well, when school started up again, I threw away the cart, and had no weed… so it was pretty easy to get back on track.

me right now

I don’t smoke every day. I don’t even really have the desire to smoke anymore. Obviously, I do sometimes. Now it’s Sunday. And I smoked on Thursday night at like 1 AM even though I had a 9AM (evil of me) and I smoked Friday but I had been drinking and boy oh boy do I love to smoke when I’ve been drinking. The point is that I don’t smoke every day. I could’ve smoked today and I didn’t. And I like to imagine that I’ve beat the addiction. Probably not… it will probably get me again some time. But I’m very comfortable with my bad habits now.

What is the moral of the story

I don’t want this to scare anybody from smoking weed. I just wanted to share my experience and give a caution so maybe somebody doesn’t make the same mistakes I made. There’s a lot of really good parts about drugs too. Just know the situation you’re in. I would tell myself, I’m not addicted, but anyone who says weed isn’t addicting is a weirdo clown that truly needs help. Don’t start smoking for no reason like me… If you are stressed out, cool smoke. If you’ve been drinking and you just want to get lit, cool smoke. Don’t smoke because you are bored in your dorm room. Go make a friend or make a TikTok edit or something. No matter what you do stay safe. If you feel like you have a problem, you probably do, and you should reach out to someone. I mean you could even reach out to me as a former, recovering, and probably future weed addict LMAOOOOO. For real though, throw the cart away, and if you think you might smoke too much, just try and go two days without it, only to prove to yourself that you can. Good luck guys, and happy smoking.